hungryghosts

(that's not me)

i love to surf, although i do not know if i can honestly call myself a surfer. my progress over the years (i first picked up a surfboard around 2005) hasn’t been marked by either the incremental or rapid growth that i had hoped for. i can certainly sit on a surfboard (without the use of my hands, thanks), and i can paddle much more efficiently than before. beyond that, the search for any remarkable improvement is left wanting.

nevertheless, some inner passion always compels me to go at some pont. and so, i woke up early this morning, around first light i’d venture to say, quickly ate my overnight-soaked oatmeal, packed my stuff and headed for sunset beach. perhaps not in that exact order, but you get the picture. it’s been awhile since i’ve gone surfing and i remember nearly freezing to death during my last session. it wasn’t even winter yet. still, i figured i could handle the cold embrace of the ocean.

the water was chilly but turned out to be manageable. the sand, however, was something else. i thought i would lose my poor feet to hypothermia, and all before they would even meet the chillier ocean floor. i paused to stretch and to allow my blood to circulate a bit more before taking the plunge. when i did, it was into an unrelenting shore break that masked an otherwise glassy surface. it took me a good fifteen to twenty minutes just to get twenty to thirty feet offshore. ask any surfer and they’ll tell you, “that’s pathetic.” it was probably in those fifteen to twenty minutes that i would experience the most strenuous portion of my surf odyssey. that’s because once i toiled past the breaks, i was met with a vast tranquility. pacific ocean indeed.

i can’t say i was really disappointed. like i said, it’s been awhile, and being reunited . .. .well, it feels so good. i enjoyed watching flocks of birds seemingly floating away the morning and having close encounters of the pelican kind. i didn’t mind one bit taking in the glare of the sun off that smooth surface of the ocean. all of a sudden, a wave similar to countless others preceding it decided to break at my exact location. before i knew it, i was traveling faster than i ever had without the help of mechanical innovation. surfboard granted, it was au naturale, and god as my witness, i was downright giddy. mind you, i didn’t actually catch the wave. the wave caught me, and hell, i didn’t even try to stand upright.

and then i knew, instantly, why i would never be a great surfer, or a good one at that. the standard reasons aside, those being a lack of consistent practice and an adversion to consult sage advice, i was already much too content, already all too happy with being taken for a joy ride on poseidon’s tab. not such a bad thing i guess, but i never thought i’d be comfortable with settling. maybe the ocean has a way of pounding out all of your aspirations. it’ll certainly put you in your place. then again, maybe that’s ok. maybe it’s ok to appreciate what you have, to admire first hand the beauty that could crush you at any moment, and still return. and maybe, if there exists a thing called religious experience in this world, perhaps this is it.

(what was the point of this post again?)

i’m still shook

new demo on the music page. it’s called “after the quake,” inspired by author haruki murakami’s similarly titled collection of short stories.

the jalopy sessions

i wanted to compile some of my songs on an actual disc so i could distribute it to people. in the end, i didn’t feel like coming up with album art, nor did i think the quality of the recordings warranted physical manifestation. but, these recordings are as near and dear to me as my flaws so naturally, here they are. these ten songs represent a two year period and together they comprise what i call the jalopy sessions. i’ve posted most of them on my blog in one form or another and some of them return unalterted. if you want an mp3 cd, i’ll happily put together some random album art to go along with the cd (hopefully to your amusement).

cheers.